|Nurturing Our Spirited Children|
|Home||Parent to Parent||Resources||Site Guide|
My name is Lisa, spirited adult, mom to my spirited 11yo and 6yo sons.
Helping parents raising spirited/high-need children, find parenting resources that *really work* with spirited children, and, most importantly, places for support is our focus.
If there's one common thread to many of the emails I receive, it's this...
"I had no idea there were other parents with kids like mine!"
In fact, estimates are that approximately 10% - 15% of ALL PEOPLE are spirited. That includes children & adults, all over the world. It looks different in each person.
It's not something we outgrow ..... It's who we are.
It's not a problem to be "fixed" ..... Our spirit should be nurtured.
It's not a 'medical' diagnosis....It's a description of our personality.
To the extent that personality traits are genetic, it can 'run' in families.
So what is 'spirited'???
Spirited is simply one label used to describe a group of specific personality traits that, when combined, can make parenting *and* growing up especially challenging. Some people describe the behaviors, others describe the actual traits. There are even different labels! 'spirited', 'difficult' 'high-need', 'high maintenance', etc...
The most important steps you take are the first ones - accepting that your child is being true to him/herself and that maybe what you need are different solutions, maybe a different focus to some of your parenting skills (spirited kids tend not to respond to the 'tried & true' in our culture), maybe more support from other parents, maybe more information, or maybe all of these.
You are your child's most important and influential advocate!
Don't let the "experts" take away that power! Remember . . . knowledge is power . . . choices are yours. As you continue to read and gain a deeper understanding of who your child is and what makes them 'tick', you'll slowly adjust how you approach parenting. You'll also fill your 'parenting bag' with the necessary skills to determine whether or not your child is also in need of additional medical/psychological evaulations. I don't know the numbers, but far too many gifted and/or spirited kids are also diagnosed with ADD, DSI, ODD, etc.
As Mary Sheedy Kurcinka says "Progress....not perfection!"
I hope our site helps spark within you the faith that you are not alone in living your day to day life or in the choices you make. We're all learning how to reframe similar challenges into opportunities to learn and guide our children as they find their way in the world. Finding parents in similar situations, sharing your experiences, and offering others support can have the most amazing impact on your life.
You've been gifted this child . . . your choice lies in how you perceive this gift.